i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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