you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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