I think scott just propositioned me for sex
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
