He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
FUCK WHALES
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize