Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize