I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
