So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
