so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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