i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
