They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize