Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
