I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Still dying that you shit outside
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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