see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
