i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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