D3 body, D1 cock
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
