Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
