I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
