its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
i now understand why vodka
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize