Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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