come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Randomize
