What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
