Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
