Where is the hickey?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Randomize
