Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize