Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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