Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
