Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
