Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
