Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
operation have a gay friend backfired
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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