if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
