You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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