Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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