my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
COCAINE IS GR8
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