Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
