Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Randomize
