like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize