At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
