she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
