lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
