is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
