I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize