I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize