She said her name was "party"
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
