He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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