I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
