3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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