Porn is love you can see.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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