ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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