hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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