I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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