Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
